BlackOne
10-03-2008, 02:34 PM
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN :
*Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
*Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
*Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
*Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
*Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
*Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
*Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.
*Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
*Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair.
*Shave armpits and legs.
*Turn off shower
*Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower
*Spray mould spots with Tilex.
*Get out of shower.
*Dry with towel the size of a small country.
*Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
*Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
*Walk naked to the bathroom.
*If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
*Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
*Admire the size of your wiener and scratch balls.
*Get in the shower.
*Wash your face.
*Wash your armpits.
*Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
*Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
*Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
*Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
*Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
*Pee.
*Rinse off and get out of shower.
*Partially dry off.
*Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub thewhole time.
*Admire wiener size in mirror again.
*Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
*Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
*Throw wet towel on bed.
*Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks.
*Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
*Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.
*Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone.
*Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins.
*Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.
*Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.
*Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red.
*Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditioner off hair.
*Shave armpits and legs.
*Turn off shower
*Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower
*Spray mould spots with Tilex.
*Get out of shower.
*Dry with towel the size of a small country.
*Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.
*Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile.
*Walk naked to the bathroom.
*If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound.
*Look at your manly physique in the mirror.
*Admire the size of your wiener and scratch balls.
*Get in the shower.
*Wash your face.
*Wash your armpits.
*Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.
*Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
*Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
*Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap.
*Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
*Pee.
*Rinse off and get out of shower.
*Partially dry off.
*Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub thewhole time.
*Admire wiener size in mirror again.
*Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
*Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again.
*Throw wet towel on bed.