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BlackOne
04-10-2007, 01:37 PM
I received this via email today. Quite amusing !

Ok people, how Australian are you really ? If you were born here then you should get 100% on this test.

New Aussie Citizenship questions.

LANGUAGE
1. Do you understand the meaning, but are unable to explain the origin of, the term "died in the arse" ?

2. What is a mole ?

3. Are these terms related: chuck a sickie; chuck a spaz; chuck a U-ey ?

4. Explain the following passage: "In the arvo last Chrissy the relos rocked up for a barbie, some bevvies and a few snags. After a bit of a Bex and a lie down we opened the pressies, scoffed all the chockies, bickies and lollies. Then we drained a few tinnies and Mum did her block after Dad and Steve had a barney and a bit of biffo."

AUSSIE CUSTOM

1. Macca, Chooka and Wanger are driving to Surfers in their Torana. If they are travelling at 100 km/h while listening to Barnsey, Farnsey and Acca Dacca, how many slabs will each person on average consume between flashing a brown eye and having a slash?

2. Complete the following sentences:

a) "If the van's rockin' don't bother ...................

b) You're going home in the back of a ................

c) Fair suck of the ............

3. I've had a gutful and I can't be fagged. Discuss

4. Have you ever been on the giving or receiving end of a wedgie ?

5. Do you have a friend or relative who has a car in their front yard "up on blocks" ? Is his name Keith and does he have a wife called Cheryl ?

FOOD

1. Does your family regularly eat a dish involving mincemeat, cabbage, curry powder and a packet of chicken noodle soup called either chow mein, chop suey or kai see ming ?

2. What are the ingredients in a rissole?

3. Demonstrate the correct procedure for eating a Tim Tam.

4. Do you have an Aunty Myrna who is famous for her tuna mornay and other dishes involving a can of cream of celery soup ?

5. In any two-hour period have you ever eaten three-bean salad, a chop and two serves of pav washed down with someone else's beer that has been nicked from a bath full of ice ?

6. When you go to a bring- your-own-meat barbie can you eat other people's meat or are you only allowed to eat your own ?

7. What purple root vegetable beginning with the letter "b" is required by law to be included in a hamburger with the lot ?

CULTURE

1. Do you own or have you ever owned a lawn mower, a pair of thongs, an Esky or Ugg boots ?

2. Is it possible to "prang a car" while doing "circle work" ?

3. Who would you like to crack on to ?

4. Who is the most Australian: Kevin "Bloody" Wilson, John "True Blue" Williamson, Kylie Minogue or Warnie ?

5. Is there someone you are only mates with because they own a trailer or have a pool?

6. Would you love to have a beer with Duncan?

Tigerv8
04-10-2007, 02:08 PM
And what about having mates with nicknames such as Rat, Bucket, Snake, Sparrow, Chunder, etc? Yes, they are real nicknames, and no, I wouldn't necessarily want my family to meet them. But it was fun at the time.

shannon
02-11-2007, 10:14 PM
Ahh i love it, particularly language part 4. Why dont we all still talk like this. It'd be a bloody ripper if we did. Then maybe the'd have to teach foreigners to speak australian. Even the poms wouldn't have a friggin' clue what the hell we're on about!!